I’ve pretty much always been the kind of gal who follows her head, not her heart.
This time, though, it feels different. I’d grown tired of my own internal monologue, the continuous stream of complaints of feeling unfulfilled and directionless in this post-college world (never mind my poor friends who dutifully listened to these whinings out loud!) It took some time, but I finally allowed some quiet into my heart.
Perusing older posts from the ever-inspiring blog of one of my yoga teachers one day, I read the following:
I beg you to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer. Perhaps you do carry within you the possibility of creating and forming, as an especially blessed and pure way of living; train yourself for that–but take whatever comes, with great trust, and as long as it comes out of your will, out of some need of your innermost self, then take it upon yourself, and don’t hate anything.
-Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
I’ve since read this so many times that the words feel like the lyrics of an old familiar song, or a childhood nursery rhyme. It was a gift given to me at the perfect time, and set me free from my fears and worries about the uncertain future.
Slowly an image of my life began to unfold for me, and that inner voice in my head became louder and louder. Taking a small leap into the that foggy future, I’ve signed up for a yoga teacher certification program! My head doesn’t know what’s going to happen next, but my heart feels full and content.
I’m so proud of my friends for making their own leaps recently, and I can’t wait to see where they – and you – land.